Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Finding Happiness

Oh, how I've struggled with this and continue to struggle with this.

I don't know what gave me the notion that "things" would ever bring me happiness, but somewhere in my 29 years, I've picked up that idea. I know in my heart that things will not bring me contentment, but for some reason, I still live as though they will/do.

Why do I do this!?!?! If my heart knows the truth, why can't my head catch up?

I know that the only thing that will bring me true happiness is God. I know that. So, you can imagine how frustrating it is to realize that I am not living my life demonstrating that truth. Oh so frustrating.

I just need to pray. I need to ask God to change me and my outlook. I need to spend more time with Him, in prayer and in His word. I just need to immerse myself in His truths.

Since Friday is my last day of work before Baby comes, I plan on spending a lot of time with God before her arrival. I know that I will change this way of living with His help. I am going to ask Him to help me with my earthly desires and materialistic wants.
This has been a struggle for me for quite a few years now so I'm not expecting a change overnight, but still.... I'm ready to start.


laura said...

Wow, sounds serious! I hope you're OK. What kind of material things are you having trouble with?

Spending extra time studying your Bible and praying before giving birth are excellent ideas. Birth is a total God thing miracle. I prayed so much for strength during my labor, it's tough stuff--even when the baby comes as quickly as Deeder did!

Hugs. :)

Kim said...

This post contains a great message. I hope you find the happiness you are looking for.

Kim @ TheBitterBall

it's me, Val said...

Corie, thank you for speaking to my own heart. I wish you peace and strength during this time. We do all things through Him :)