Waiting Game

No Baby yet....

I am due in 6 days. A week from yesterday.

I'm starting to have nightmares that the doctor has miscalculated my due date and I'm not actually due until late June. Worst nightmare ever....

Last week I wasn't really ready for her to come. I was still preparing and running last minute errands and things.
This week is a different story. I'm ready for her to come. I'm not exactly ready for labor (are you ever?!?!), but I want to meet her so badly. I want to hold her and see her and kiss her and stroke her lil hands.

My friend, Beth, had her daughter on Saturday. Congratulations Beth and Rodrigo! She had a lovely little girl and they named her Anna. Beth was due about 4 days before me. She isn't playing the waiting game anymore. Another friend's brother and his wife had their son on Saturday too. She was due two week AFTER me. When Keith told me that her water had broke and they were on the way to the hospital, I actually cried. Real tears. I don't know what came over me, but I just sobbed "when is OUR baby going to come"? Poor Keith had no idea that was going to be my reaction and for a second he just stood there and looked at me in disbelief. I was shocked at the emotional outburst myself. But, as usual, he did the perfect thing and hugged me and smoothed my hair and told me that God has the most perfect plan for our daughter and she will come in His timing. How can I be upset after hearing those truth-filled words?

On an up note, my husband and I were able to have a wonderful Memorial Day weekend together. The weather was horrible. It rained and thunderstormed every day, but it didn't matter. We went out to eat twice, watched a few movies, read together, cooked and just enjoyed our last Memorial Day weekend as "just us". It was perfect.

She can come anytime now.
I'm ready.... I think.

My Incredible Feat (or Feet)

Yesterday I managed to paint my own toenails! Talk about an accomplishment. I haven't been able to see my feet for some time now, so I figured reaching them was out of the question.

My feet look kinda funny and swollen in this picture, but my toenails are painted. They will be "California Raspberry" for our daughter's arrival!

Don't ask me why I didn't just get dressed and splurge for a pedicure.......

Leisurely Day

Yesterday I took full advantage of my time off work. I decided to go to the Missouri Botanical Gardens, by myself. It was a beautiful day outside, sunny, but not too warm. They have a sculputre exhibit, Niki, on display and city residents get in FREE on Wednesdays.

So, I filled my water bottle, grabbed my camera and some grapes and went to the Garden.

The exhibit was really cool to look at. The artist creates these mosaic tile sculptures. Here are a few of the pieces....





I had such a relaxing time, walking around (until I started to get a little tired). Let me tell you though, a 38.5 week pregnant woman walking around by herself sure does get a lot of stares! I think people were looking at me, scared I was going to blow at any moment.

Maternity Leave

Friday was my last day at work. So, today is my second day of "official maternity leave". I am so glad that I decided to take off before Baby arrives. It's only been two days, but SO NICE!

Yesterday I napped for two hours and managed to squeeze in one more highlight and haircut before she comes. Thankfully my friend Annie was able to schedule me beforehand, because who knows when I will have time to schedule that after Baby comes. Today I napped again! Yes, I did! (If you know me, you know that BP, before pregnancy, I was not a fan of naps- felt like they were unproductive), went to pick up my prenatal vitamin prescription, rented 4 movies from Blockbuster and checked out 3 books from the library. I plan on relaxing as much as possible and doing all the things that will probably be hard for me to do in a couple of weeks (or less!).

I have my two doctor appointments tomorrow, my non stress test at 7:30 and my weekly OB check up at 4:45. If I feel up to it, I think I will go to the Botanical Gardens. City residents get in free on Wednesday mornings. I also need to go buy a Baby Book. I can't believe I don't have one yet. I saw one I really liked early on in my pregnancy, but haven't been able to find it again.

So, that's my life in a nutshell.
Hope you all are doing well and enjoying this beautiful spring weather!!!!

Motherly Advice

So, I am at the point where I am thinking about starting to make my "to-pack" list for the hospital. I've looked online at suggested lists of items to pack. What I would like is your advice.....

What items were absolutely a necessity to you? What things did you pack that you didn't need?

Most of the lists suggest bringing a robe. The robe that I have is not really appropriate for a hospital stay. Do you think that a robe is necessary? I'll have to go buy a cotton robe if so.....

Tomorrow is my last day of work. I finished most of my work today. I'm not quite sure what I will do in the office tomorrow. I just know that I am pretty excited!

Finding Happiness

Oh, how I've struggled with this and continue to struggle with this.

I don't know what gave me the notion that "things" would ever bring me happiness, but somewhere in my 29 years, I've picked up that idea. I know in my heart that things will not bring me contentment, but for some reason, I still live as though they will/do.

Why do I do this!?!?! If my heart knows the truth, why can't my head catch up?

I know that the only thing that will bring me true happiness is God. I know that. So, you can imagine how frustrating it is to realize that I am not living my life demonstrating that truth. Oh so frustrating.

I just need to pray. I need to ask God to change me and my outlook. I need to spend more time with Him, in prayer and in His word. I just need to immerse myself in His truths.

Since Friday is my last day of work before Baby comes, I plan on spending a lot of time with God before her arrival. I know that I will change this way of living with His help. I am going to ask Him to help me with my earthly desires and materialistic wants.
This has been a struggle for me for quite a few years now so I'm not expecting a change overnight, but still.... I'm ready to start.

36 Week Update

(this picture was taken last week, 35 weeks)

Ok, so I had one post that was not baby-related. I can't help it- it is all that seems to be going on in my life right now.

We've been really busy. We got our bedroom rearranged and made space for Baby's crib and dresser. We only have a one bedroom apartment and Baby will be sharing our room for awhile.

We contemplated moving our bedroom into the living room and turning the dining room into the living room, but this just made the most sense. We have a feeling that we will be moving to back to Illinois soon anyway.....

We interviewed and picked a pediatrician. I'm really happy with the one we picked. He is close to home, very personable, and even has Saturday hours!!! Keith and I both liked him a lot and we had no questions about using him. One more thing checked off our list.....

I told my boss today that my last day of work will be next Friday, May 16. I had originally planned on working up until my due date, but that is turning out to be unrealistic. I'm tired. I ache. I decided to take the two weeks off before my due date. I'm going to use that time to finish preparing the place for Baby, take naps, and read a few books. If she comes earlier than my due date, then I'll already be off work. My boss was really great about it. He even asked if I wanted this week to be my last week, but I still have some work to finish before my last day.

I had my OB appointment yesterday. My first weekly appointment. Everything still looks good. Blood pressure is good, baby's heartbeat sounds strong and I am dialated 1 cm. Whoo Hoo! I had a growth ultrasound and they estimate that she weighs 6 lb. 12 oz. With three more weeks to go, she's gonna be a good size little girl.

So, that's my update.
Sorry for yet another post dedicated to impending motherhood! One of these days I hope that my mind will be more than one-track again......

Robin Red Breast

(Note: Please forgive the following pictures. They were all taken through the window and screen and at a horrible angle, but I wasn't about to open up the screen!)

About a month ago, we realized that we had a robin's nest right outside one of our bedroom windows. Just sitting right there on the brick ledge.

The nest had 4 eggs in it. We watched the robin sit on that nest and protect the eggs day in and day out....

The night of my Girls Night Out at church, Keith left me a voice mail that we had baby robins! The eggs had hatched! I'm not sure what happened to the fourth egg, but there were three baby robins just sitting in that nest.

I was told that it is the Daddy robin that takes care of the babies. Well, he did a very good job! Every time we pulled up those blinds, if the Dad wasn't already sitting on those babies, he soon would be! He must have constantly been on watch, because seriously, within 15 seconds of us pulling up the blinds, he was there, protecting his babies. He did such a good job of bringing worms to the hungry lil birds.

Every day the birds grew. They soon started to lose their "baby" feathers and kept getting bigger and bigger. After awhile, they would flap their wings, but I never say them fly. I started to wonder how on earth the three birds were fitting in that little nest.


Friday morning, the baby robins were there. When I checked on them Friday night, they were gone. The nest was empty. I guess the birds decided it was time for them to start their little lives. It was kind of sad. We didn't even get to say goodbye.

Hope they have found another cozy home by now.
I wonder if we'll have another robin's nest next year......

May!

I cannot believe that it is May 1! Baby is due next month, so I have one month (or less than one month if she decides to come early). Wow.

In spite of the sickness (and more sickness) and diabetes and loads of testing, pregnancy hasn't been that bad. It could have been much worse. I am thankful that I didn't have to go on bed rest, although lately it sounds pretty nice. I am thankful that she seems to be doing really well in there and growing and maturing just as she should.

Lately though, it has been getting harder. My body is tired. My back hurts, my feet are starting to swell and I've felt my first contractions today! Kind of feels like cramps, which I had pleasantly forgotten about. I'm constantly hot and the moodiness is setting in. Take yesterday for example- I was just sad. No reason, nothing happened. I was just sad and I couldn't shake it. I apologized to my husband, tried to let him know that he had done nothing wrong and I wasn't really sure what is wrong with me. Luckily, he is very understanding.

I know part of it is hormones. Part of it is being mentally and physically exhausted. Part of it is something else I can't quite put my finger on. I think I feel like my world is revolving around Baby right now- packing bags, making checklists, doctor appointments, preparing her space, reading books... which leaves little to no time for me. In a way, I feel like I have lost part of myself recently. I need to make time for just me. Read a book, get a pedicure, have some tea with friends, just do something for me.... no baby talk or preparations allowed.
Plus, I'm starting to get a little nervous about when she actually arrives. Will I be a good mom? Will I know how to calm her? How to make her happy? Will I be able to breastfeed? So many unknowns.... I realize that I cannot worry about all of these things, that eventually they will fall into place. Still, they are there, in the back of my mind.

On a positive note, I think that Keith and I have decided on a name for Baby! We aren't sharing it though, so you will have to wait. I still can't call her by her name because I know that once I start, I will slip and use it and our little secret will be out.

So, my next post will have nothing to do about babies or pregnancy. That is my promise to myself. One way for a little bit of "me" time.....